Gaining Space

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When your to-do list has too much on it

photo: John Schultz

The holiday songs will tell us,

It’s the most wonderful time of the year...ding-dong ding-dong.

But it’s also the busiest time of the year, right?

I mean, just listen to the song—

There'll be parties for hosting
Marshmallows for toasting…

Are you kidding me?

Not only do I have to buy gifts for everyone, write holiday cards, get the guest room ready, but now there’s a party to host and I have to buy marshmallows?!!

Marshmallows were most definitely NOT on the list!

Take a look at your holiday to-do list.

Is there anything on that list that you absolutely don’t want to do?

Did you know that you have free will and you don’t have to do ONE THING on that list?

  • You don’t have to let your brother and sister-in-law stay with you.

  • You don’t have to cook a holiday dinner.

  • And if you do, you don’t have to make everything from scratch — that’s what boxed potatoes are for! Sanity!


Not doing these things that you think you should do is not a problem.

The problem only comes into play when you have a *thought* about not doing those things.

The problem happens when you make it mean something about yourself — that you’re the “type of person who doesn’t [insert that thing you don’t want to do].”

Scandalous.

What do you think that says about you?

Did you know that you could not care that your mother thinks the way you do things is wrong?

And did you know that you could not care that your brother’s wife wants you to drive the 3 hours to their house for the holidays this year?

And did you know that you could not care about attending every holiday party you were invited to?

There are things that you think you should do.

For instance, I sent Christmas cards my entire life.

I loved sending Christmas cards. Every year, I would write a personal note in each card.

I used to send 40 Christmas cards-a-year.

Then about five years ago, I paired it down... only sending cards to people who sent me cards. That brought the list down to 18-20.

Then last year in early December, I got sick with a bad cold. Followed by 2-3 weeks of bronchitis and coughing. I didn’t feel like sending my usual Christmas cards.

So instead of forcing myself to do them, I just decided that I didn’t have to do any of it.

And do you know what?

The world didn’t end.

And I still have friends.

Here’s my challenge to you:

Take a look at that to do list of yours and cross 2 things off of it.

Right now.

Decide that it’s OK to not do [that thing] and it’s OK not to do [that other thing] too.

I’m not doing Christmas cards again this year and I feel amazing. No guilt.

Now I have more time to spend quality time with actual people, not pieces of paper that I send in the mail.

Maybe next year I’ll CHOOSE to send cards again, but for now, I want the time for myself.

What are you deciding not to do this year?

And what will you do with your time now that you have less to do?

* * *

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