Did you watch the Academy Awards last night?

And, if you did...

How many minutes (or hours) have you spent online shopping today for metallic cocktail dresses...?

sexy, matching metallic pumps...?

or, an iridescent midnight blue tuxedo jacket?

And let’s just say your life doesn’t exactly revolve around formal events.

Oh, but watching that red carpet show can be so seductive. Like, “their lives looks so glamorous — I want that!” kind of thinking.

Am I right?

No shame.

I just caught myself after 10 minutes on the Anthropologie & BHLDN sites.

Why do you think it occurred to me to ask you this question today?!!

I’m in the trenches with you. I get it.

I’m so glad I’ve done all this work on my brain and was able to catch myself.

Because it was only a few years ago that I would have added $749.85 to my Amex card... gotten that box delivered to my door, and then... wore that thing (whatever it was) once. Maybe 3 times, before realizing that it didn’t fit with my lifestyle or that it was so so itchy! (Watch out for metallics — they will kill you — so itchy!!)

Let’s get real though

I work from my home office most days and have all the dresses and shoes I need for date nights with my husband or for when that rare “fancy” occasion arises.

And no matter how much I want to be like my beautiful friend Meghan McLane (pictured above — I swear this woman goes to the grocery store in the most beautiful dresses), you’re probably not going to find too many occasions for those white angel wings or peacock feathers to make them worth the money or figuring out the storage technicalities.

(side note: I have seen Meghan in yoga pants too — she’s a normal human, don’t hate her. Love her.) ;)

So, back to my near-miss shopping spree

WHY did I just waste 10 minutes scrolling through > Dresses > Cocktail & Occasion Dresses on Anthropologie?

Because I’m searching for a feeling.

It’s why we do anything.

Feelings

I think that if I get that gorgeous dress that my life will somehow be better!

I think I will have all the energy of my yoga/dance instructor friend Meghan McLane!

I’m searching for a feeling that I think that lace cocktail dress can give me.

I think if I buy that dress...

• I will always have fun, like my friend Meghan McLane seems to.

• Life will be easy, carefree, a constant party.

• I will have more energy.

• I will be beautiful all the time.

• I will have more friends.

• I will never have bedhead (and if I do, it will look FAN-TASTIC!) (again, like my friend Meghan — XO)

• People will look up to me.

• People will love me.

POW! There it is.

It usually all comes down to love, right?

Most of us, when we probe and ask ourselves WHY we want something. We start out with superficial answers. But when we keep going and find all the answers to why we want something, we get to the heart of it.

WHY do you want THAT?

And why do you want THAT?

And why do you want THAT?

(repeat)

I swear it always comes down to wanting to feel things like love, connection, or freedom.

OK, now…

Close all those online browser window tabs immediately!

Do not pass go. Do not collect (or SPEND) $200.

Close ‘em!

Then—

Remember those 3 questions to ask yourself while shopping (online or in-store)—

• Why am I here?

• What is the feeling I’m trying to feel right now by buying this?

• How do I think owning [this thing] will add to my life?

It’s no crime to want to feel good and confident in what you wear.

In fact, I’m a big proponent of only wearing clothes you love.

I’m also a big proponent of being realistic to your lifestyle, budget, and the constraints of your closet size.

If you can make angel wings and butterflies in your hair work in your every day life, please do it! Upgrade your wardrobe. Wear things that make you feel fantastic.

If you have the budget and the inclination, go for it.

But then, please throw out, recycle, or donate! all those frumpy clothes you usually wear.

Go all in.

Fill your closet with things that make you feel alive and sexy (or whatever it is you want to feel).

Like my friend Meghan.

And remember WHY — be aware of the feeling you’re wanting to feel by wearing that thing.

That’s the most important part.

* * *

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